Wednesday, March 9, 2011

It was either a sign from God ...

or a tmemptaion from the devil.

Yesterday started off pretty well - got some good work done on my project for work (emphasis on my ... Not the companies, not for the company.  My project for me to train my drivers better), then Pam and I spent the afternoon together before I was supposed to meet my sister for spin class (emphasis on supposed to).  We had a nice lunch before walking through the mall ... then came the intestinal pain, not horrible but bad enough for me to figure lunch was not agreeing with me.  And then my nose started running again, complete with the sneezing fits.

Nothing worse than a runny nose with aching intestines ... except maybe an aching nose with running intestines.  I left a message for my sister (and Pam text messaged our niece to get a hold of her mom) to let j=her know I was probably skipping the class.  The visual of me projectile vomiting across the spin room didn't sit well with me.

Today was going fine until after I left work.  The famous last words of "Let's stop by Sam's Club to get a few things" was pretty much my undoing ... I really, really hate that place - the crowd, the hectic environment, the rude people, the ambient noise level akin to a jet engine in a toilet stall ... I hate it.  But just when you think it can't get worse, Pam's ex boss shows up acting like he actually cares about somebody other than himself and his atrocious "just for men" 5 minute comb through ego enhancer.

Ex boss - who we will from this point forward refer to as Supreme Jackass (or SJ for short), "Are yo working?"

Pam, "No ... Still can't.  Anxiety & depression is still too intense"

I am trying to be cordial at this point and not snap SJ's neck and squirt his microbrain across the store like the festering boil he really is.  Just the sight of him brought back 2+ years of horrible memories and feelings, but I am trying to be cordial.

SJ, "Oh my gosh ..."  Which I interpreted to mean, "You know what?  I don't really care, but if I pretend to be sincere maybe my conscience won't haunt me at night knowing that we threw you out like a plate of day old caviar and never thought about you again ... I wonder if the next Escalade I get should be Ivory with maroon interior or eggplant with ... Oh wait, they're still in front of me.  I better hold this obviously fake smile for a while ..."

At this point my blood is boiling.  I politely excused myself and walked off ... muttering to myself and freaking out store employees and customers, but I walked off.

After that things kind of went downhill ... I accidentally became one of the rude imbeciles I hate so much.  The guy in front of us had set his stuff on the check out stand but left 2 cases of soda in his cart (which most people do).  I put a divider on the belt so I could start putting our stuff up and he moved it ... I rather abruptly slapped another one down and began to transfer my stuff whe suddenly he's moving the cases to the belt.  I felt stupid and apologized stating I thought he was leaving the sodas in the cart ... he wasn't mad.  Now the lady behind us was starting to put her stuff on the belt ... No problem, but sh had 2 1/2 carts packed full of stuff and there was only room for a few things ... but she was stacking stuff and stacking stuff  and when she realized she didn't have room for even the 1/2 cart she actually started pushing our stuff further forward and squeezing more stuff in there.

One of the things I went there for was razors ... my legs are just way too stubbly.  The don't actually have the razors on the aisles, they have the "buy this product" cards that you take to the cashier ... the cashier then stares blankly at it before calling one of the many minions who does not have access to the supply room so he has to run around and find a manager who really doesn't care and carries the card around for nearly 10 minutes before finally realizing she has something in her hand that is totally interfering with her ability to send text messages or touch up her lipstick, so she nonchalantly meanders off the floor and comes back 4 minutes later saying that she could not find the razors but if we want to wait she could get a forklift operator to lift another minion to the top shelf and see if maybe they were put in the wrong spot ... but that's the system at its best ... unfortunately it didn't go that well for us and amongst all the furor my brain went into lock-down.

When the manager finally returned and said they didn't have the 14 pack of razors we paid for, but she could get us a 5 pack with a free "shaver thingy" I don't think I was too polite.  I was now officially in a hurry because I was supposed to get to the gym so I could get a spot in the spin class ... but by this point I didn't feel like it.  We wound up getting our money back for the razors and took off.

I did go to the gym and I did get a spot in the class and started my early warm-up as usual, but even my favorite music wasn't getting me into the mood, but by this time the room was packed and I didn't want to just walk out.  Finally the instructor showed up and announced that the lady that followed her into the room saved her and made it possible to have spin class (it turns out the instructor forgot her shorts, but I'm not supposed to know that) but because the room was packed she wanted to know if somebody would give up a spot for her.  Then the instructor found out that the desk overbooked the class ... again.

If it was a sign from God - Thank you.  If it was a temptation - I failed.  I gave up my spot.  I had been riding for almost an hour and actually did a pretty intense ride for a self directed ride, but my heart was just not in it.  I told the lady that she could have my spot when another lady ( a regular in the class) told me I couldn't do that ... that they had to go down the wait list.  It's my spot ... I give it to her!!  Leave me alone, mind your own business, it doesn't even concern you.  Next thing I know there are three staff members in the spin room with clipboards all apologizing to me for me being displaced ... why don't you guys care this much when I'm actually upset about things??  I received no less than 7 apologies from 4 different staff members before I got out of the gym.

Did you read this far??  If so, thanks ... and I'm sorry I wasted so much of your time whining.  At least I included a sentence about training  :-\

This picture pretty much describes my thought process by the end of the Sam's Club excursion

1 comment:

  1. Sorry to hear about Pam, I didn't know she struggled with such things. Send her my way, if you like, I can give her top notch survival tips. :)